Tuesday, September 29, 2009

I’m so exhausted now. On the way home, I was thinking about things, a lot of things. To be more exact, friendship was what I was thinking about.

Sometimes I really do get tired of it. The continuous battling of whom we should have in the clique, the constant gossiping of who you dislike and on, don’t you find it tiring? I’m starting to ponder, how long are these going to last? When am I going to get tired of this? Is it really right to do this kind of things behind someone else’s back?

Yes, it is a kind of relief, a way to vent our frustration for the person. But at the same time, when we are frustrated, we tend to not think logically, we do all sorts of stupid things. And in the meanwhile, we hurt the others surrounding us, breaking the bonds that we had, and destroying the friendship that we’ve spent so much time and effort building.

It’s so political, so tiring. I’ve already felt the drifting apart from you guys. We used to be so close, to the extend we do crazy things together, going for meals together, going to other classes for lunch, just so we get more time to chat about stupid stuff and going crazy over good songs.

All these things that we did together became history. When I was having this thought in my mind, I felt lost. It suddenly felt so surreal, as if I lost some family member. It just hit me so badly. We were so close, but now, we barely even talk now. Suddenly I felt so tired of this.

Maybe it’s my fault, maybe you guys are now thinking what kind of crap I’m talking about. But the problem is that I really still see you as a friend, no, closer than a friend, as if you’re my family. I’m really sick and tired of this politic, can’t we just be like how we used to? Maybe let us just open up and talk, I don’t mind knowing my problems, “Nobody is perfect”, and I bet I’m not the “Nobody” in the phrase.

I value you, my friend.
You’re a friend that I can trust, a friend that I want to trust and a friend I will trust.